God bless those twenty-somethings. This is the last year I’ll be referring to myself when I sing along with Sza as she croons that line in “20 Something” . As I prepare to enter the last year of my 20s I look back with bittersweet feelings, as I’m sure many of us do. I accomplished some of the most amazing things during the past decade: climbed two parts of the Great Wall of China, transitioned back to my natural hair (then chopped it off 7 years later), married my college sweetheart, gave birth to two beautiful children (one preemie) and ultimately walked away from a comfortable career, my marriage and faith in the last year and a half. Damn….All.The.Things.

I’m grateful for the experiences I’ve had and rather than bore you with a long anecdotes from precious moments of my 3rd decade of living, I decided to write out 29 lessons I’ve learned. This has been a thrilling, exhilarating and challenging time period of time for me, but I consider myself a lifelong student of many things. In particular, relationships, how they flex and grow over time and more specifically my relationship with myself. I only began the work to start loving myself in my 28th year. I expected my husband and kids to pour the love into me that I needed to grow and while it was shocking when I realized they wouldn’t, it was the most freeing, and exciting challenge I have come up against. I was ready for the challenge then and I still am! So keep reading, please comment your lessons, and if this resonates show love on the blog and share the post!

The Lessons…

Love yourself girl or nobody will. Wise words from J.Cole, and becoming more relevant the closer I get to 30. It all starts with loving yourself enough! EVERYTHING!
We create our own happiness.
Energy is a tool to be used to your benefit or abused to your detriment.
Being the cycle breaker is hard, thank God for the gift of resilience.
You don’t always have to be the hero… so stop trying to be.
Red lipstick makes everything better, especially Bawse Lady by the Lip Bar. If you haven’t tried it, do so now and thank me later!
Create realistic to-do lists and maximize your productivity!
Solo sex is amazing (yeah, I said it)!
I am my own worst enemy if I chose to be. And I can chose different.
Everyone needs therapy. (Yes, you too!) Seriously, stress can kill you!
Money is as limited or unlimited as you perceive it. Your perception determines the energy you create around money which dictates your mindset. A scarcity mindset will keep you broke since you will operate with a limiting energy. Develop an abundance mindset and watch how your resources increase!
I love pets, but in small doses.
Motherhood is hard AF. But there is nothing as rewarding as watching your children grow up!
Flaunt your curves and f*ck the naysayers. Some days I like to be modest, other days I like to pull out the thot-wear and that’s my prerogative!
WAKE UP… Because nothing comes to a sleeper but a dream. (quote by Serena Williams)

*To be a carefree Black girl is a beautiful thing* **Photos by Charlie B**

Meditation is not devil worship *inserts eye roll* and can help you to connect to universal energy aka God’s energy aka Holy Spirit (His active force).
Social media is what you make it and the way you feel about it is usually reflective of how you engage. (i.e. messy people are usually the first ones saying they hate social media because of the drama, the gag is they are usually the ones creating it).
The only competition you have is your ego, your excuses, and YOURSELF!
God is the ultimate communicator and he is unlimited in his means to get us the message we need. It’s just up to us to receive it. (*see #16)
A girl gang, tribe, crew or whatever you want to call, is mandatory! When women come together to empower and support one another and build genuine friendships, we are truly unstoppable!
With that being said, keep friends around who will fill you up and love from a distance people who deplete you (friends, family or otherwise!)
“No.” It’s a complete sentence, you owe no one but God any explanation.
God bless the child that has her own!
Love is an ongoing series of actions, not just a thoughtless salutation or conversation ender.
Self-sabotage is real, so recognize the signs and change what you need to get out of your own way!
Exercise and eat healthy so that you feel good, not just to look good.
Drinking water is literally the key to life! Skin glowing, body poppin, energy right, the secret is always water!
Take nothing personal. Just be excellent.
Work smarter, not harder. MANIFEST THAT SHIT!

With Love,

Keisha Marie